Groom and Bride forced to abandon Kodava Marraige Ceremonies. Asked to abandon the mantap and shift to the room for seeking blessings from the Guests.
According to the news report in Shakthi Daily, a marriage between a Kodava & a non-Kodava was disrupted at Kodava Samaja at Vasanthnagar in Bangalore. This time at the receiving end was the the Mukkatira Family. The members of Kodavame & Nellaki stormed the wedding hall and stopped the customary proceedings of the marriage.
This is the second time the people from organisations claiming to be protecting Kodava Culture & Traditions have barged into a wedding and have created ruckus in the marriage. I had written about the previous incident and the mother of the bride had commented about the same.
The Modus Operandi of these organisations is quite interesting. They seem to receive first hand information of the marriage that is going to happen between a Kodava & a non-Kodava at Kodava Samaja and barge in at the very moment when the marriage is taking place at Kodava Samaja.
The last time an organisation calling itself Nanga Kodava had barged into a wedding and disrupted the wedding of a Kodava bride with a Non-Kodava Groom. They had said that “they had no issue with a Kodava marrying a non-Kodava, but they should refrain from doing so under Kodava customs”. In a stark similarity the same view is of the members of the organisations which raided the wedding of the Mukkatira Family at the Kodava Samaj, Bangalore.
The members of these organisations went a step ahead and even dictated the further proceedings of the marriage.
To quote from Shakthi Daily;
They stopped the ‘Kodava valga’ being played and other rituals like ‘Ganga Pooja’. The couple were made to sit inside the room, instead of the ‘mantap’ to receive blessings.
Interesting to note is that there seems to be no security at Kodava Samaj and this is the second time people have gate crashed a wedding at Kodava Samaja and created a scene in a private function. And seems the Kodava Samaja is not bothered to file a police complaint in this regard.
Update: Seems the news being spread about what really happened is doubtful. While Kodavame and their supporters claim that there were able to stop the wedding the ceremonies, The Groom’s Sister has claimed that they were booted out of the hall and they(Muccatira Family) carried on with all the ceremonies without any issue. If so, then Kodavame and their ilk is on a propaganda war to suit themselves, irrespective of the fact being they got shooed and booed away from the wedding and they “were not able to stop the wedding” or “coerce the Muccatira family into backing off from the ceremonies”. But they went on spreading rumors about the “ceremonies being stopped” and made everyone(mostly their target market – The Kodavas) feel that they won the day and have achieved something great. Seems Shakthi Daily, Brahmagiri , Poomale, etc fell for their bait and published the wrong news. In turn, starting a passionate debate on the back of a incident,”Which never took place”. Plus, as Toddy is pointing out in his comment, Kodavaame has repented their actions and has gave in writing to the police that they will never indulge is such fast ones. Here are the Brahmagiri scans sent by Toddy.
I am a Kodavathi married a Christian. Today my husband n children speak Kodava, love Kodava food, their Kodagra thatha mane, and every festival and ritual of Coorg. It is in the nature of Coorg to make everyone fall in love with the land and culture. I still lead the life of a Kodava and yes it hurts not to have the manepeda. Never mind as long as your family and dear ones are with you. Love happens unknowingly especially when someone loves you for what you are without any expectations and I am happy as I have created my… Read more »
Good to see, lot of spices (masala’s) adding to the story…
Very simple dont need to fight – Support the Incoming bride & dont support the outgoing bride.
hi this is sumana. i am from
bengali comunity. i love xxxxx xxxxxxx last 7 years. he is from
coorg.kodava comunity. we love each other too much.we want to marry. but
This intercust marrige is possable? please help us. we can’t leave
each other alone.
Dear Sumana,
Please do not post “personal details” of your lover here. We have removed the name. Yes, intercust marraige is possable and many Coorgs have non-coorg spouses. Ultimately, it is upto you both to decide about your life and future. You dont have to leave each other alone, I wish you both be together, forever. 🙂
I think the fear of alienation and the fear of fading culture sometimes get the better of us. In this case,i believe the fear of losing the culture and the very thought being deep rooted has caused untoward incidents. Those followers need counsellors. Peace!
i agreee wid machaiah…. y disrupt such a joyous occassion? its such a imp day for the couples…. hence forth all weddin shud be done wid tight security…no compromises
see marrying out of coorg happens by love, and not my arranged marraige…. u cant say when u fall in love,hundreds of love marraige are proof of it…. a person doesnt fall in love by asking caste…. now if u love ur wife it doesnt mean u hate ur mother… similarly if u love a person doesnt mean u want to abandon coorgi customs… so people marrying out of different caste and who love coorgi culture will take more pains to marry in a coorgi way becauz they love coorg …else they wud have married in a simple way
get marrid to persons of ur choice…for u love is the only religion rite? den follow oly that …don make fun of the traditions n look at it as an entertainment for others
By the kodava names v r recognised by all n makes us distint n special from others…..when v kodavas wear are attire we feel it n its a pride…nobody can carry themselves in kodava attire other than kodavas…..and for others who want to try it out…its jus a fancy dress for them n an experience…dey jus say wwwooowww!! and den over ..dats it
This is a free world, anyone can marry whoever he or she likes each other. Why these un educated guys creating problems. If they really want save Kodava culture then it is not the way. Common guys you are not in the pre independence time. Time has changed change yourself to new world.
But is thr any hope that these voilence will stop? can someone who is planning to marry a non kodava or non kodavathy get married peacefully at kodava Samaja? Now we all know the problem, can we all find a solution?
Hey friend
It’s going to be very fine as I am a husband of a Malayali Nair girl.The statements what you read ..what you hear all are nothing just a mere prick when its par with the beautiful life ahead..so the solid core of relationship is only with you and your beloved so it depends how far you go with it ,how strong are you…so it’s only you and your boy gonna lead the life ..
Dear fellow Kodavas
We don’t need any further explanation to prove that ..why our population is declining in a worrying pace ..we being fanatic like this we are alienating ourselves.when a we marry a non kodava ..let’s teach them our tradition and culture thus increasing our number.The hooligans who created havoc in the wedding should know this better.They are the one pushing our wonderful culture in to the brink of danger where already we are in the endangered status.
very well said. I am facing similar challenges. I am glad you have such thoughts
Hi everyone,Jus happened to stump into this article while searching for some coorgi recepies and the outraged comments of a few people over intercaste marriage made me follow up..I am a kereliate girl of 21 years in love with a coorgi boy wishing to spend the rest of my life with him..i dunno about caste or creed by i only know that we are two mature individuals who understand each other and would like to culminate this bond into the institution of marriage when it is the right time .I jus cldnt hold back my tears when i read ur… Read more »
Ramesh has emailed that document as proof. What are your impresions?
Circus like that makes one wonder.
Have emailed you guys. Need some clarification. Pl check.
I agree with you. They have attempted to do yes.
Could you email me to the above email. I have changed my email. Thanks.Iwill send you the documents.
Have emailed you.
Do you have an email where i can send you a document/s.
@ Kempa, I have a opinion and I don’t support their approach in this particular issue. I have no issue with the organisation as such, I have learnt that they have also done some good work in the past.
@ Toddy. Are you talking about a new marriage ? Can you let me know the date when it was published in Brahmagiri ?
Dushyant,
For now we are certain your website is biased. We would boycott it.
Check this there was a recent publication in a kodagu paper BRAHMAGIRI..against Kodavaame Kodavaame tried sending threatening calls and SMS and other such to this wedding girls father, wedding was on 15th of jan 2012, finally brides father gave a police complaint at high grounds police station, Bangalore , got Roshan Somanna and others arrested. It was learnt Roshan gave in writing to police henceforth he and his kodavaame will never disrupt any kodava inter-caste weddings. Later Roshan gave some different version in a kodagu paper poomale , that’s why brides father gave a big press media statement at Brahmagiri… Read more »
Benny, Comments are posted after moderation. We have not deleted any of your comments. Only comments that are deemed to be derogatory, include profanity, are off topic, vague, etc are deleted.
Why do you delete many comments and support those idiots? If they can find a job and respect women it would help.I have never seen stupidity displayed in public.I feel ashamed
Roshan Somanna Udiyanda wht does he think??? “We only hold that one should be born in a Kodava family to wear the attire which has so much of value and respect” who are we..?? he forgot humans are just mass of flesh and blood with a bumping heart.. every costume has its own respect.. when any one wears it he feels it… and pple dont wear it for fun.. then UK pple would say : pple born in UK can only wear and can respect suit.. (joke of d day) and i think he is not aware tht tourist cme… Read more »
dearest sunil… how small u think?? wht is kodavame doing with marriage.. offcourse we dont have any doubt tht we love our culture.. it doesn’t mean if u get married to a non coorgie u cant folllow the kodava culture… there is no where such things written.. it is u kodava who think small created…
i agree…
i would like to say.. there is absolutely no problem in a coorgie getting married to a non coorgie or vice versa.. we dont choose to b coorgies or non coorgies.. when we get married we get married as men and women.. rituals might change, wht is wrong in accepting new rituals..? accepted in movies and not in real life.. its like a joke.. i seriously wonder who those jokers are who got into this business of creating difference and creating scenes in wedding… i think they need to b little more educative to understand life… i can go on…… Read more »
i agree
Sunil.. Why is that KODAVAME is asking us to marry in someother custom/rituals. We love your custom and rituals. We are not disrespecting anyone. We just don’t want people to dictate us what to do . Its our wedding and we’ll do the wedding as we wish . We respect the emotion and value of Kodava custom that’s the reason being a kodava even if marrying a non- kodava we would want to follow our custom and not others. KODAVAME has to understand what the family is going through and respect their emotion too.
first of al hi 2 al my coorgies . i m nt married but im a christian n my mom is a coorgy my mom n dad loved each other n got married n the thing is i want 2 get marry in a coorgy culture bcoze i love coorg n my fav place is also coorg . i hve seen my cousins marriage it was awsome i prefer to settle down in coorg n live like a coorgi
To all the Followers of this site who are actively participating on the inter-caste marriages discussion. Also to the comments who oppose Intercaste marriages – If you can understand, the protest is only against use of KODAVA customs in inter-caste weddings. Why does anyone want to wed in KODAVA custom when one has no respect to KODAVAME? What do you gain out of it? No one is stopping you from wedding out of community. It is your wish. But do not disrespect our customs. If you want to show the world that you are wedding some body, you can always… Read more »
Thank you so much. Its just that all the false things told to people has really hurt us badly
I really don’t care which group it is . Its just not the way to behave. If they really want to do something for the communtity please let them help the poor and needy or people who need medical help then doing such nonsense and getting insulted by peolpe . People will be glad to support this cause and it want be just 10 or 15 people but everyone will support the good cause .
Hi Sneha, Thanks for letting us know the correct story. So you mean the people who barged into the wedding were Nanga Kodava members ? and not Kodavaame & Nellaki ?
Sneha, We regret the Inconvenience. Nothing has been deleted. We are receiving a lot of comments here. We moderate the comments, and thats why the delay in posting the same. I have marked your email as a subscriber with access, so you get free access to comment anytime with minimum delay in posting the same.
A little fact on Muckatira wedding. The so called protectors of kodava culture are just provding wrong facts to the newspaper . The fact is all the customs and ritauls where performed as per tradition . Yes the ‘Kodava Valaga’ was stopped for a few minutes by this group by force and scaring the poor people . However it was started again and the guest danced there way. To add this, the group also got insulted by the guest present at the wedding so badly. All the rituals like ” Bhale Kettoo ” , ” Damapathi Murtham and Ganga Pooja… Read more »
It strange that whatever i have commented has been deleted for some strange reason. I am Grooms sister and here is a little fact on Muckatira wedding. The so called protectors of kodava culture are just provding wrong facts to the newspaper . The fact is all the customs and ritauls where performed as per tradition . Yes the ‘Kodava Valaga’ was stopped for a few minutes by this group by force and scaring the poor people . However it was started again and the guest danced there way. To add this group also got insulted by the guest present… Read more »
Hi Danny , I am the groom’s sister. The so called so group were suppposed to do slient protest outside the building, however entered a private function as uninvited guests and also got insulted by the guests at the wedding. The wedding went as per rituals and customs as it needs to be followed. However i think so people are blind that they don’t see things properly. The bhale keetoo , The dampathi murtham and Ganga pooja all were conducted . To prove the facts we can provide the photo’s . I think people need to know actual facts and… Read more »
@ Danny
Violence in the marraige would have made the whole function a worst
memory for the bride , the groom, family members and the guests, so it wont make any sense to beat them up.
Sneha, were you one of the guests at the Mukkatira wedding ?. The article does not say that Nanga Kodava were involved. They were involved in a similar wedding previously. Members from Kodavaame & Nellaki were involved. If you were one of the guests at the wedding and if you can let us know what exactly happened in the marriage it will throw proper light on the matter.
Thank you for understanding us. However whatever paper has printed as informed by Nanga Kodava is not completely true. The fact is all customs and rituals were followed as per tradition and facts can be proved
A tooth for a tooth. The mukkatira Okka members present at the wedding should have taught them a lesson. Serikh batundinjith.
PS: we are not a family. we are an Okka. Okka is unique, Manepeda is unique and so is the members of the same Okka attending the marriage.
I know of many who have married. Whats the issue if they do and they get married with Kodava Customs. It only generates goodwill for our culture.
Teach them a lesson. The Grooms family should file a police complaint.
Osama is dead. Now lets tell Obama to go after Nanga Kodava, Kodavame & Nellaki. 🙂
I am a Kodava. I feel ashamed to know that these fellow kodavas have indulged in something like this. It is shameful act and they should be held criminally liable for it.
Deepest sympathy for the Mukkatira & Bride’s family. Such a important occasion in their life turned into a bitter memory because of these thugs.
The members of Nanga Kodava, Kodavame & Nellaki are watching too much of TV9.